Monday, October 17, 2011

We are fat old farts.

        Fibby and I are getting some ever so attractive guts. I attribute this to the coming winter season, as my body is preparing to be in hibernation mode and pounding on the blubber to keep me warm. Which is totally necessary... because I live in Florida. It has nothing to do with my uncontrollable appetite for chocolate and cheese. No no no, absolutely not. Fibby's excuse is that she lives in a home where she is fed by three different people even though I have insisted time and time again that she does not in fact need a small portion of my dog's food every time he eats (not even including the dry food left out for him 24/7  that she also eats). even if she whines. Noone listens to me. So I just let her get tubby. She's kind of cute that way anyway.. as I've mentioned before, with her tiny little head. She's like a backward little bobble head doll.

except she doesn't hang out on my dashboard..

        While Fibby is doomed to be forever fat unless she gets some serious cardio into her daily activities list, I have the option to de-blubber myself simply by getting just a smidge more exercise. Enter, my bicycle. I have fallen head over heels in love with the damn thing. Riding here and there and to and fro and back and forth, and stopping at the gas station to get a save the boobies jone's soda (pink cream soda).

it even matches my pink bike

         I'm not going to go on about the sex life I now have with my bike, just thought I'd get the idea across. Anywho, today while I was riding I suddenly recalled that Fibby's birthday (or at least the approximate one I gave her) is on the 23rd of this month. My little baby Fibby is going to be 1! I've been wishing that Fibby could join me on my bike rides and so I thought it the perfect idea to buy her a little basket to do just that for her birthday. I found one on amazon that has a little sun shade and a harness to keep her safe in the basket. Not to mention is the thing fucking adorable.

some lady and her dog that fibby and I are cuter than.. just kidding ;)

        I really think that Fibby is going to have a grand ole' time in her basket. As in it's not one of those things that I'm just forcing her to do because it's cute. The basket isn't supposed to ship until sometime after the 25th but I figure that Fibby will live to get her bday present after the fact. Maybe I will just slap a party hat on her for the actual day to make her feel special... or royally pissed off. Either way, wouldn't that be so ca-uuuute?

By the way, I got a fish at the fair. His name is Dudley.

 (Mwahahah, so punny)


becky ducote said...

well dudley is now in a big pond and growing nicely and has settled in just fine.

Fibby's Modern Life said...

I'm so glad Dudley has found a better home than the stinky bowl. :)

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